What I Know About Texting

So I've been thinking a lot about the way I come across when I'm texting others, and I've come to the following conclusion: I hate texting.  I'm really bad at it.  But I am trying to learn how to be a better texter. Over the last few months, I have learned some helpful hints that I would like to share with you:

1.) The Short Text Problem.
Example Text: "Thats okay"
What the girl is thinking: "Ohmygosh he's being so rude and short with me!"
What the reality probably is: The dude is probably in the middle of something important (to him, at least), and probably doesn't have time to send out a longer text with proper punctuation.
How to prevent this problem: "Thats okay :)" 


Now everyone is as happy as the punctuation at the end of that message.

2.) Finding Hidden Meanings in a Text
Example: When someone starts their text with the word 'hey,' you can learn a lot from the way they misspell it.

For the record, a similar curve seems to exists for the ratio of texts to smiley faces a person sends.

3.) Other Advanced Uses of Emoticons

-[8l]  "Everyday I'm Shufflin'"

(V) (;,,;) (V)  "Need a new emoticon?  Why not Zoidberg?"

d:-) >  "Sup,' bro?"  (Note the cap and popped collar)

(:    "This smiley is upside-down.  This is how I communicate with people from Australia."

=)   "This smiley has big cute eyes.  It makes my text that much more expressive."

(^<  "Quack."

          "I'm a whale!"   (Note: apparently this only works on an iPhone) (Note 2: this fad died out three months ago.)







'__________________'

Please Help Me!

So about a month or two ago, my blog became one of the top million websites on the web, according to Alexa.com.  I think that's pretty cool, since there's somewhere between 200-350 million websites on earth (it varies widely based on who you ask).  Now that I've broken that barrier, I want to see how far I can go.  Perhaps someday I could overtake http://www.growwheatgrass.com/ as the  586,220 most visited website.

But there's one hitch with this vision:  I generally blog about my life, and I live a terribly boring life.

You see, I always have these great intentions.  I envisioned myself accomplishing quite a bit this summer--going camping, reading tons of new novels, learning how to cook something that isn't frozen, etc.  But now that summer has started and I'm free from classroom obligations that took up so much of my adventure time, I've been decidedly less productive.  Here's a chart breaking down my free time since the spring term ended at BYU:



Clearly, this isn't material that makes for an interesting read, so this is where you guys need to come in.   Please help me live a more exciting life!