Just to be redundant, here's what the card says:
THE HOLIDAY PROVO
MAXIM
MANSION PARTY
10 ways to chase and be chaste
KISSING 101 that will keep you out of the Bishops office!
SECRETS to get her under the mistletoe ;)
PARTY
FRIDAY
12.10.2010
EPIC PRODUCTION
Club DJ of the Year
SHAWN PHILLIPS
Dress to Impress
Vegas Style
Free Egg Nog
NA Mixed Drinks
Picture with Santa's
Maxim Crew
White Chocolate Fountain
Now, maybe I'm an old fashioned prude, but I kind of found this invitation a bit...distasteful? Isn't Maxim the "Playboy Lite" gentleman's magazine? Why is it sponsoring a party targeted at BYU students?
I don't know, I kind of have a hard time with parties out here sometimes. For me, they usually fall into two categories with very little middle ground.
Category 1: The uber-Mormon party.
Music is provided by a live band in their later forties. The setlist is old folksy music that nobody but ballroom dancers know. Otherwise, the music is done by an EFY DJ and includes hits like The Hamster Dance, Alvin and the Chipmunks, every line dance ever, and the jazz song that plays in Chips Ahoy! commercials. Bouncers keep out guys who haven't shaved in over twelve hours and immodestly dressed girls. Dance Nazis make sure there is no suggestive dancing, potentially dangerous stunts, and that guys' hands are never allowed below a girl's shoulder blades during slow dances. Experience can best be described as being 12 again ("I knew learning the Electric Cowboy in elementary school would come in handy!").
Category 2: The Underground party.
Usually happens in a parking garage, creepy house, or back alleyway. There is a large selection of alcoholic drinks without alcohol in them. This includes pina coladas and margaritas. Decor is urban underground with rave-style lighting. Music is Top-40's, Hip-Hop, and Rap. Girls take this opportunity to wear their non-honor code approved apparel. Dance styles include the Bump and Grind, and that's about it, since there's very little room to do anything else. Experience can best be described as attempting to dance inside a can of sardines, and all the female sardines are half-naked.
Usually, if I want to get my dance on, I just turn on my iPod and dance when no one's watching. Anyone want to join me?
I really appreciated this post, especially since I've been wondering the same thing lately. I'm glad to see I'm not just crazy. It does seem like there's no middle ground. I really enjoy dancing, but I just haven't been able to have a good time at a dance lately because they are so extreme (one example being on Halloween when a friend and I stopped by a stake dance, got bored, stopped by the Alpine garage, got scared, and went and ate crepes the rest of the night). The one exception to this has been Social Dance labs, and that's just because we all know the same ballroom dances and are able to do them. Not too common outside of the class.
ReplyDeleteSo in answer to your question, yes, I'd like to join you in dancing when no one's watching. In fact, I do all the time. :)
YESS! One of my favorite memories of you is you dancing under the Eiffel tower with your french hat on. Am I going to go find that movie and watch it right now?yes.
ReplyDeleteElisabeth: I went to both of those dances, and they are like my main inspiration for this post! My goodness that night was lame.
ReplyDeleteJessica: If you can find that video, would you please send me a link to it? I have actually never seen it. And I'll have you know that I am better at not moving like a spaz now.